We often think toxic ministry environments are created by leaders alone. But that is only half the truth. They are sustained—quietly, subtly—by people who see, sense, and yet remain silent. Not because they are weak, but because they are human: seeking belonging, fearing isolation, and longing for certainty. At some point, we must confront an uncomfortable question: What role did I play in what I allowed?

Even more, I was cautioned to separate myself from them because they had incurred God’s wrath by dishonouring a man of God. The warning was to separate myself from them to avoid being collateral damage in the wrath of God. It is circumstances like these that get people to seclude themselves.

I was having a conversation with a woman of God via text and she said to me; “God plans our pain with purpose, so that others may receive...