Over a year ago, I struggled deeply with my writing; especially with poetry. I didn’t like how dark my pieces sounded. By dark, I mean- they gave me a sense of sadness or gave a morbid vibe. So I stopped writing poems.
Then after a while, I stopped trying to write – I didn’t think my writing was good enough. I kept comparing the reach and feedback to what I thought other people had. It discouraged me and convinced me that writing wasn’t my thing. So I stopped writing all together, and channeled my energy into all other things.
My husband noticed I wasn’t writing anymore – because I had stopped showing him poems and articles for his feedback, and he started coaching and encouraging me. So I kick-started the Bitter Honey series again. In doing that, I was still scared to write poems, because I didn’t know how that will go. Though I was making the effort to write the Bitter Honey series, I became dormant with my gift, because I was not exercising it fully.
Even with this blog post, I had decided to write it three weeks ago but since that moment, I had all the right excuses not to sit down and write it.
A few days ago, I saw this bible verse:
“…old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.”2nd Corinthians 5:17b NKJV
It shifted something in my mindset about writing. It gave me a breath of fresh air, and lit up the understanding of newness. I used to wonder why I had to ask God for forgiveness in every prayer, or why we were asked to seek mercy and forgiveness in every church meeting. Eventually, the Holy Spirit gave me an understanding. There is a posture of surrender and submission that comes with always seeking forgiveness from God. Truly, we may not be aware of all the things in our hearts that displease God – it is for that reason, that we need Him and His mercy in every moment of our lives.
Needing God and acknowledging it, gives the newness in each day to approach situations and problems with His strength and mindset. It doesn’t matter if previously, you didn’t care about God’s point of view. Once in this moment, you submit to Him, there is that newness – and all things before then have passed away. This understanding reminded me of what my pastor told me concerning my writing – to ensure that my inspiration is solely from God.
In context, I may not have been entirely confident about what I used to write, and the art that came out of my mind and hands. I may still not be as confident but I am confident in God’s ability to make life, thoughts, art and everything else new.
It is in that mindset and with that ethos that I wrote and recorded this spoken word piece;
‘The Third Charm.’ Yes, my husband had to push me until we finally recorded it , then push me some more until I uploaded it – but it was a first step.
Here’s to rebirth in our lives and in every space that has been put to death and is in need of life.
I’m curious to know what you think this poem is about?
Share your thoughts in the comment section below!